Managing Your Kids Emotions for the Eventual Move

Moving is Emotional For Children

We all know that moving is hard on all of us, and not just physically, but emotionally as well.  But children, who can be very reliant on routine and tradition, have no idea what may lie ahead of them.  This uncertainty can affect their emotions and behavior.  Some kids, like some adults, can handle change without a problem.  They have personalities that tend to seek out challenge and change, and thrive on it.  But others may fear the unknown.  Here are some tips to help you prepare your young ones for a smooth and healthy transition.  And who knows?  Maybe talking it out and addressing it as a family will help the adults manage the move better as well.

1 You Are In It Together – As you begin to talk about the move with your children, make sure they understand that each member of the family will have their own reactions to moving.  Encourage conversation about what you are looking forward to in the next home/town, and what you’ll miss in the town you are leaving. Express member of the family should feel comfortable about expressing their emotions, including the adults.  But it’s important for the adults to remain positive in front of the children.

2Shop Together – When a move is inevitable, and you know where you are heading, make sure the kids feel like they’re a part of some of the decisions.  Getting their buy-in early will help them accept all the newness that is coming their way. After you’ve identified the neighborhood based on schools and other criteria, bring them along to help you pick the specific house.  This will help them get excited about the features and highlights of the house you are buying.

3Recruit Their Help – As you begin to pack, host your yard sales and basically pack and purge, make sure they are participating.  Get them to give away some toys to Goodwill.  Give them a small box and let them pack some stuff.  It will give them a sense of ownership and control over the moving process.

4Access Information – The internet can give you a ton of information on a new town.  Let’s the kids explore the sites that provide ‘things to do’ and ‘family fun’ events so the kids have something to look forward to. Drive by the school they will attend and ask for a tour so your child knows where he/she will be going, can ask questions themselves and  feel more comfortable when they first attend.

5Resources - Depending on their age, there are books that can help keep the conversation going about your impending move.  Books are a great starting point for discussing concerns and questions.  There are book that help children say goodbye to friends, how to meet new friends and how to manage anxiety they might be feeling. 

Cynthia Schick,

CCP Web Design Staff Writer and Google Author